12 Jan

Anal Lubes

Anal sex is completely different than traditional penis-in-vagina sex in all the obvious ways, but also in terms of preparation. Many people believe numbing lubricants are for anal, but nothing is further from the truth. Discomfort (and maybe even some pain) reminds you to go slow to avoid injury. There are no one-size-fits all when it comes to lubricants, especially those for anal sex: some swear by water-based while others insist on silicone. But it’s worth looking into anal lubes that are condom-friendly, like Pjur’s Back Door Anal lube, or that have ingredients that keep tissue around the anus moisturized and help with healing, suck as Swiss Navy’s Premium Anal Lubricant with clove leaf oil that benefits skin. Couples should also look at investing in a lube shooter (CalExotics’ Lube Tube or XR Brands’ Cleanstream Silicone Lube Launch are great choices) to ensure there’s plenty of lube for anal sex. 

Cream Lubes

Cream lubes lets couples apply a generous amount of lube without a lot of mess. Cream lubes don’t run or drip, and they are easy to see how much you’re using at once. System JO recently released new cream lubricants specifically designed for masturbation: Bucked Smoky Wrangler comes with a light smoky leather scent, while Bucked Wrangler is unscented. Boy Butter is considered an elite cream lubricant and its uses extend beyond sex: it also can be used to soften and moisturize rough skin on hands, feet, elbows, and more.

Desensitizing Lubes

Oftentimes, these types of lubes are marketed for anal sex, but they’re best used afterward to help with healing and recovery. For penis-in-vagina sex, they can help men dealing with premature ejaculations to relax and last longer. Most rely on lidocaine or benzocaine as the numbing agent, which effects lasting a few hours at best. Just remember that sensitizing lubricants will affect both partners, meaning they could have an impact on her enjoyment. Anal-Ese from Nasstoys is one of the original products in this category.

Flavored Lubes

These are the lubes that have come the furthest in recent years. It wasn’t long ago the options for flavored lube were strawberry, watermelon and mint and not much else. Not only were flavors limited, but they also often had a medicine-like aftertaste, much like cough syrup. These days, there are gourmet flavors like Adam & Eve’s Cotton Candy lube, Intimate Earth’s Salted Caramel Natural Flavors Glide, Wet Dessert Flavored Lubricant (flavor options include Whipped Cream, Bananas Foster and Frosted Cupcake) and Wicked Sensual Care’s Aqua flavors of Sweet Peach, Cherry, Pink Lemonade and more. Look into multi-packs or sample packs that let you try a few flavors with one purchase. The true quality of a flavored lube? If you can eat it over ice cream and enjoy the great flavor!

Hybrid Lubes

If you really want to settle on just one lube for all purposes, consider a hybrid. These water-based formulas are blended with silicone to create a longer-lasting lubricant that might not be as heavy. Sensuva’s Hybrid Formula Personal Moisturizer is designed for people who are sensitive or have delicate tissue. Hybrid lubricants are safe for use with most toys, including silicone sex toys, such as Sliquid’s Silk Hybrid Lubricant, which is hypoallergenic and safe for use with latex and rubber, too. 

Massage Oils

It might seem odd to use massage oils as lube, but many these days are designed for dual purposes. Earthly Body is a leader here, with edible massage oils in amazing flavors like Banana, Pineapple, and Mango in formulations that combine hemp, almond, grade seed, apricot, and vitamin E oils for moisturizing. All of the ingredients combine for a slick glide too and pare healthy enough for any body.

 Natural Lubes

Couples are getting more and more educated on the ingredients they are using on and in their bodies, even when it comes to sex, and rightfully so. Natural lubes use more natural and organic ingredients and avoid some chemicals that might be harsher for vaginas and anuses. Most natural lubes are free for paragons, petroleum, glycerin, and other sugars. Sliquid’s entire line of lubricants and other products fall into this category, and Sensuva, Swiss Navy, Wicked Sensual Care, and Wet all boast amazing products for those looking for natural items.

Silicone Lubes

Long praised for their long-lasting gliding effect, silicone lubes are where a little goes a long way. They don’t dry out or get tacky and there’s no need to keep applying during long play sessions. They should not be used with silicone toys, however, because they can break down and destroy the toys. Alchemy’s Silicone Personal Lubricant is safe for use with condoms and other latex items, as is Body Action Products’ Extreme Glide.

 Stimulating Lubes

Some lubes warm up, while others provide a calling sensation. And there are some companies developing two lubricants that pair together, kind of like “two great tastes that taste great together.” Warming and cooling lubricants are the perfect first step to dabble in temperature play. The most common ingredients are cinnamon or mint. Sliquid’s Spark uses food-grade menthol that cools when applied but then warms up with friction. Swiss Navy, a leader in the lubricant category, offers Infuse, side-by-side products to “excite his passion and delight her senses.” A long-time bestseller for Doc Johnson, GoodHead Warming Head Oral Delight Gel is great for use during blowjobs, since they warm his penis or her labia, and come in great flavors: Strawberry, Cotton Candy and Watermelon.

Water-Based Lubes

Consider the all-purpose lube, water-based lubes are safe for use with any people, as well as any toys and condoms. They closely mimic a woman’s natural lubrication, which is a major plus, but they can dry out pretty quickly, meaning you need to reapply often. Adam & Eve’s Pheromone Water-Based Lube blends with your body’s chemistry to increase attraction, and Pjur’s We-Vibe Water-Based Lube is great to use on its own but is specifically formulated for use with pleasure products from We-Vibe, manufacturers of premium sex toys for couples. 

28 Dec

Why do I like BDSM?

One night, your friend tells you a story about getting adventurous in the bedroom, or you might have read about someone else’s experience getting spanked and liking it. It awakened something in you, but you’re not sure what is going through your head? Why do you like the idea of BDSM? We’re going to explore this question to give you a thorough understanding of why you enjoy this type of activity!

Psychology of sexy corporal punishment

As most BDSM sites shared - the truth is that a lot of people around the world absolutely love BDSM; we want to talk a little more about the psychology of sexy corporal punishment. The psychology behind sexy corporal punishment can be very difficult to understand. In fact, it’s still being studied by certified psychologists!

However, the studies have found that people who enjoy BDSM typically embody some specific traits. For example, people that enjoy these practices are usually open to experimentation. That should be rather obvious, but there is also a love of discipline and order present in people. A high level of the conscientiousness trait can be found in both doms and subs, but not in switches. That means these people are more likely to have a willingness to keep things in place where they belong. 

Research also shows that doms are more likely to rank lower in agreeableness than subs and switches, which means they want to be in control of a situation. On the other hand, subs have a level of agreeableness similar to that of a control group member. 

The psychology of BDSM is deeper than we can get into here. Just know that many of the traits that make people interested in BDSM are rooted in their psychology, and that can explain vanillas!

Preparing for a punishment session 

How do you get ready for a good punishment session? There are several things that you have to do, including listed below.

  • Establish a safe word:
    • every BDSM practitioner should always have a safe word that stops the action.
  • Communicate with your partner:
    • what do you each want to get out of the experience?
  • Dressing the part:
    • does part of the role play involve costumes?
  • Clean and prepare all the toys and objects;
  • Set the mood before you start:
    • light some candles or do whatever you have discussed before to make the room look great. 

These are some of the basic things you can do to get ready for a hot punishment session. Always make sure you consider your partners’ needs before you begin!

The types we love 

BDSM comes in many different forms, so it’s important to know about the activities available to you as a dom or sub. Here are some of the best types of BDSM play that you can take part in!

Dom and Sub

  • Law Enforcement and prisoner;
  • Teacher and student;
  • Royalty and peasant:
    • these include domination and whatever acts the two have in mind. 
  • Bondage:
    • when your partner ties you up for a set amount of time.
  • Impacts:
    • when your partner is slapping, hitting, or otherwise flogging you.
  • Sensory torture:
    • you are tickled, paddled, or submitted to other sensations.
  • Removal of senses:
    • you can be blindfolded, nose plugged, ear plugged, and more.

These are just some of the different kinds of BDSM play that you can get involved with as someone starting. 

What we get out of it 

We have to ask ourselves, what do we get out of BDSM. Different people get different things. Some people get into it so they can exert control over others. Other people want to be a sub because they like it when their control over events is taken. Some people enjoy the sensations of pain or the pleasure they derive from being treated to tickling or spanking. Most importantly, it’s a journey of self-discovery. You get to discover how you feel after being put in scenarios that would never play out in your daily life. 

The importance of aftercare

Aftercare is one of the most important things you can do for your partner. If you’re punishing them for the sake of punishing them and don’t offer them aftercare, that’s not fun, and the results can be bad. 

You need aftercare to differentiate the “scene,” or the act, from real life. Rubbing lotion on a place that got slapped or being friendly with your partner can prevent a “drop,” a time when a person comes down from the pleasant feelings of BDSM and deals with the aftermath. A drop can get ugly for the sub, so you need to take care of them after a scene. 

Spend time together, have food, take a shower, and give them painkillers. These are all forms of aftercare that they will need!

BDSM practices are very fun and highly common in the world today. If you’re trying to get started, you need to understand why you find these practices interesting. Based on this information, you should have a better grip on what you get from it, why you like it, and how to behave after it’s all over!

11 Mar

Vibrator 101

Learn About Vibrators 101

When it comes to the world of vibrators, there are a lot of options available. Below are a few things to think about and understand before you make your first (or second or third) purchase. Like people, sex toys come in all shapes and sizes. When considering your toy, ask yourself how or, more importantly, where you would like to use it. These are some main shapes/styles of vibrators available today:

Types

Bullets

Bullet vibes range in size from 1-3 inches in length and typically look like their name implies; a bullet. While the overall design hasn’t much changed, they certainly do get the job done. Those looking strictly for clitoral stimulation would do well with this toy. Due to their size, they are discreet (some even come in sneaky packaging to look like a lipstick). They can be used solo or with a partner and can be easily tossed in an overnight bag, dresser drawer, or even a purse for on-the-go orgasms.

Stick Vibrators

These vibes are longer than your standard bullet and range in size from about 4-7 inches. These are primarily used for internal stimulation, though they can also be used externally if you have any mobility/dexterity issues. These typically tend to be on the slimmer side and are usually smooth.

G-Spot

Like a stick vibe, g-spot massagers are intended for internal use. Most will have a slim, straight shaft with an egg shaped bulb on the end. This bulb, once inserted, will massage the g-spot that is located about 2-3 inches inside the opening of the vagina. Being that the g-spot is part of the clitoral network, stimulation in this area can result in an intense orgasm.

Wands

You know those “back massagers” you would see ads for on late night TV? That was the original iteration of one of the most powerful toys available. Wand-style toys look similar to a microphone with a bulbous vibrating head and a shaft to maneuver. If you want a lot of power, the original design that plugs into the wall is going to be your best bet. With technological advancements, however, these do also come in rechargeable options. The frequency at which these vibrate offers a deeper, rumbling sensation that is intended for external stimulation (though you can get attachments for internal stimulation if you are looking to really rock your world).

Rabbits

For those of us old enough to remember Sex and the City, this iconic toy has been a go-to for people for decades. This toy has the best parts of a stick vibe and a bullet combined into one! Rabbit vibes tend to be what most people think of when they’re first considering getting themselves a toy. They come in all shapes, sizes, colors, and functions so try to keep that in mind while shopping.

Dildos

These are sort of the “other” category of the sex toy world. Dildos can vibrate, but don’t always have to. For the sake of this article though, dildos typically range in size from 4-12 inches and often look like a penis. Those that do not look like a penis will be thicker than a stick vibe and tend to have more nuance in terms of shape. They will often have a suction cup base that can be used for riding or in a harness for partner play and the vibration speeds and patterns will vary from toy to toy.

Details

Functions and Features

So here is where things can get interesting. With advancements in technology, vibrators don’t just have the three low, medium, high settings. Now they offer pulsating, staccato, and a wide range of dots and dashes to bring you right over the edge. Not only are there different vibration patterns to think about, there are also a number of features certain toys offer that include, but are not limited to: sucking, warming, thrusting; beads that move up, down and around; thumping, wiggling, and spinning.

Size

As I mentioned before, sex toys are like people… they come in all sizes. Some will be petite and some will be, well… quite large. Something to consider when making your toy purchase is not just length, but girth as well. If you’ve only ever had a finger (or nothing) inserted, you may not be as comfortable using as girthy or lenghty toy as someone who has been sexually active or used toys before. It is important to consider your own comfort level when considering your toy purchase.

Material

Toy material is also something to take into account. While there is no federal mandates when it comes to toys, the industry does a fairly good job at self-regulation. That being said, not all toys are 100% body-safe or allergen-free.

To learn more about the different materials used to make vibrators and dildos, check out our blog "Dildos 101".

Color

Gone are the days of pink and purple being the only available color option! Toys now come in every color imaginable ranging from flesh tones to neon green and orange. While you’ll still find many pink and purple hues, you’ll have much more choice.

Other Things to Think About:

Storage

Where will you be putting your new best friend? Do your kids snoop through your stuff? If you plan to use it primarily in bed, do you have a place to store it that is easily accessible? If you want a plug-in wand, where is the nearest outlet?

Make sure to keep hygiene in mind when stowing and cleaning. To learn more about keeping your toys clean, check out our blog"How To Clean and Store Your Sex Toys Properly".

Noise Level

Do you live alone where noise isn’t a concern or do you have paper-thin walls and nosy roommates? Are you trying to get in one last orgasm before bed and don’t want to wake your sleeping partner?

Practicality

As much fun as 60-pound sex machine with full range of motion and thrusting action may be, will it take up an entire room in your house? If so, is that a problem? Do you want a toy that can do multiple things or do you want specific toys for each use? If you travel often, is your toy small enough to bring with you?

While there is certainly is a lot to consider and think about when it comes to purchasing a toy, this guide is designed help you think about what it is you want in a toy and give you an idea of what is available. If ever you need assistance, don’t hesitate to swing by your local Lion’s Den or chat with our online representatives for assistance in selecting the right toy for you!

04 Mar

Choosing and Caring for a Masturbator

Gone are the days of only the hand to satisfy! “Masturbators” or, more commonly known as “pocket pussies”, are ribbed sleeves that can enhance the experience of masturbation. As they’ve become more mainstream, there are a number of different options to consider. Below are a few things to know and think about before making your purchase.

Types

No-Case

When people think of “pocket pussies”, they’re usually thinking of these. This type of masturbator tends to be about 4-7 inches long with a mouth, vagina, anus, or non-descript opening for insertion. Most masturbators will be made of a soft, skin-like material for a more realistic experience. This type of stroker has ribbing on the inside for additional pleasure and can be moved or squeezed as the user prefers.

Hard-Shell

You may be familiar with the original designer of this style of toy: Fleshlight. They popularized the stroker sleeve inside a hard case. Because the sleeve is inside a hard case, the sensation can feel more realistic as it is the case being moved rather than the stroker itself. These hard cases will also regulate the amount of air inside the device so the user can control the amount of suction and tightness at any given time. Not only does the hard case protect the sleeve from lint/debris, it also conceals it in a discreet case. Like the no-case strokers, these also come in mouth, vagina, anus, and non-descript openings. Often, companies will collaborate with popular adult stars or cam girls and make molds of them for the masturbators.

Powered Masturbators

These kinds of strokers will take the basic design of the hardshell devices and take them up a notch. With this design, you can get a masturbator that vibrates, sucks, spins, or milks. The most popular of these designs are the ones that mimic fellatio. Most of these devices are rechargeable, though you can still purchase ones that take batteries or plug into the wall.

Though these come with many benefits, they can often be a on the loud side so keep that in mind when making your selection. They will also require a little additional care when it comes time to clean it.

Lubrication

Because these strokers don’t self-lubricate, you will need to add lube to enhance the experience. Due to the nature of the toy’s material, make sure you are only using a water based lubricant. The use of silicone or oil based lubes will degrade the toy’s material.

Cleaning

No matter what kind of masturbator you’ve chosen, they all need to be thoroughly cleaned. Small, damp spaces are the perfect environment for bacteria to grow so once you’re finished, follow these basic steps and your toy will not only stay clean, but will last longer:

  • 1. Rinse: Most masturbators will have a hole at the opposite end from the insertion point to allow water or other fluid to be rinse out.
  • Pro Tip: If you’re using a hard shell style, you can pull the sleeve out for proper cleaning. Don’t forget to sanitize the hard case as well in case fluid got in.
    Pro Tip: With a moving/vibrating masturbator, follow the cleaning direction provided in the box. Some will allow you to remove the sleeve while others will require a little more attention and care.

  • 2. Apply cleaner: While standard toy spray is an acceptable cleaning solution, for masturbators, we suggest selecting a foaming cleaner. Once inside, the cleaner will expand into the crevices. Once it’s inside, move the masturbator around to evenly disperse the cleanser. If you have just the sleeve, rub it between your hands (like if you were trying to start a fire) to spread out the foam.
  • 3. Rise again: After you’re sure the cleaner has been evenly distributed throughout, rinse it out. At this point, any bacteria causing fluid will have been removed.
  • 4. Dry: It’s important to allow your toy to dry. Store it upright on a towel to allow gravity to pull the remaining water from the chamber. Give it a few shakes to make sure all the water is gone.
  • 5. Powder: Since most masturbators are made of a skin-like material, they do require one additional care step. As you use and wash your toy, you’ll notice the material starts to get tacky. To prevent this and keep it soft, apply a dusting of toy powder once your toy is dry. It will adhere to the toy’s surface to keep it touchably soft.
  • 6. Storage: If you’ve purchased a hardshell stroker, just insert the sleeve back into the case and pop on the lid. If you have no-case stroker, you will want to place this item in a breathable bag. Then, just stick them in a cool, dry place and it will be ready for your next use! To see more tips and tricks on how to properly store your toys, click here.

Adding a stroker to your masturbation ritual can bring you to new heights in your sexual exploration. With the wide variety of toys available, you’ll never run out of new sensations to experience! Remember, this blog serves as a guide to help you think about some of the different options when considering a stroker. If you need help selecting one, don’t hesitate to stop by your local Lion’s Den or chat with our online sales rep. Happy shopping!

15 Jan

5 Common Things You Didn’t Know You Can Do On Your Period

For some including myself, that time of the month can be more than just a small nuisance. It can be a huge inconvenience, especially when you have something important to do where you would prefer that Aunt Flo not accompany you. And while the shame and stigma towards menstruation is diminishing quickly with the normalization of the female body, it may not necessarily help with getting rid of some of the reservations you may have about your own body or any negative attitudes you may have learned from others. In an effort to put an end to the negative connotations associated with Aunt Flo, here are five common things you didn’t know you can do on your period.

Have Sex

For some, sex is a huge no no when on your period, mainly because it can get quite messy. But mess is good! I mean, unless you’re doing a quickie, sex is usually messy, un-organized, and un-choreographed. Just lay down a towel and do your thing.

Masturbate

When I first started masturbating, I would be so annoyed that I couldn’t do it during my period out of fear that I would stain my sheets. It wasn’t until I saw a video on the benefits of masturbation, where I saw a tip about rubbing one out during your period and its effectiveness on reducing cramp pain that I decided to give it a try. So happy I did. Depending on how you like to masturbate, you can put down a towel, or wear a pad if you don’t want to take your panties off.

Go Swimming

Going for a dive during shark week isn’t very fun. But possible with the help of a tampon or menstrual cup. Swimmers and athletes do it all the time and it is completely normal and good for treating cramp pain in some cases. This tip can also be used when getting into a hot tub or Jacuzzi with your partner or a group of friends.

Get a Wax

The idea of getting waxed down there during that of the month can be daunting for many reasons. For one, some women can experience a lower tolerance to pain which can cause your wax to be more painful than normal. I just wanted to note however, that if you did want to get a wax while on your period and think that it would be weird or un-heard of do such things, I want to let you know that many spas and wax studios do wax clients during that time of the month. Policies vary from place to place so make sure you ask in advance before booking an appointment and make sure to bring a tampon or menstrual cup to wear during the service.

Wear Whatever You Want

Of course this goes without saying because you can always wear what you want. I do find that women tend to avoid wearing bright colored bottoms and dresses during that time of the month out of paranoia. If you are worried about staining your bottoms and dresses with blood, especially in public, simply wear a menstrual cup or a larger pad or panty liner. Works a like a charm in most instances.

Final Thoughts

While these things are very simple, it’s always good to have these things affirmed constantly so that the conversations around menstruation continue and we can put an end to the shame and stigma that comes from having your period. I would also encourage you to share this article with those in your life who have either just started menstruation or the men in your life who can use a lesson or two on periods.

 

If you like what you’ve read here, check out more of Tiffy Kinks writing at her sex blog Aquakink.com.

Twitter @Theaquakink

Instagram @Aquakink

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08 Aug

How to Have your First Threesome

5 things to know before going in and different positions

1. Communication with the others are important
If you’re going in with your partner, remember to talk ahead of time what you are and aren’t alright with you or your partner doing. Better to speak ahead of time than hurt feelings after. And with everyone, make sure you’re clear what you’re comfortable with handling and where on your body. Know who’s going to be where and what is okay to do.

2. The third person is Important
This is for those who are going into a threesome and one other person. Some prefer the third to be a stranger so there are no strings attached after, and others prefer someone they know and are comfortable with. However, be very careful mixing friendship and sex. Make sure you are clear about what expected and what you’re feelings are with the friend if you are going that path.

3. Planning and Location
By far, what people who have successful threesomes suggest is planning ahead of time. This comes down to everyone knowing what everyone else is doing, what the relationship is expected to be before and after the event, and where it’s going to be. Hotels are the best choice to have a threesome because there’s no risk for a mistake following you home and no memories attached to your home. But, don’t forget protection as well. Accidents can happen even in a threesome.

4. Make sure everyone is involved
Threesomes are made for three participants the entire time. Even if you are favoring one over the other, do not exclude them from the fun. Don’t pair off, that will leave a third wheel and hurt feelings.

5. Leave Romance at the Door
There’s no time for romance with two people. This is meant to be a sexy fantasy, and an intense one. Be ready to get down and dirty right away.

Positions

The Daisy Chain:
For F/F/M, one female sits on the bed and one in sitting on the floor at the edge of the bed with the male behind doggy style. The one on the ground will between the other female’s legs. This is a great position for the two females to switch in the middle, allowing for two different sensations.

Double Penetration:
Designed for M/M/F. One male penetrates a woman (either anally or vaginally) while another guy is in the other one. This is great because if the female is game for both penetrations, it can stimulate her in both sides. And men often fantasize completely filling a female on both ends. Win win for everyone!

The Strap-On:
Designed for F/M/F or M/M/F, this could mean that one woman wears a strap-on and enters the male or enters the other woman. The bottom could be another male as well. This is a great position to also include a toy in the fun, creating a chain of pleasure with the men and women.

The G-Spot Jiggy:
Designed for M/F/F, the man is on his knees penetrating one woman from behind, while another woman is on her back, laying underneath both while licking his balls and the other woman at the same time. If that sounds intense, that’s because it really, really is — in the best way possible.

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