04 Mar

Choosing and Caring for a Masturbator

Gone are the days of only the hand to satisfy! “Masturbators” or, more commonly known as “pocket pussies”, are ribbed sleeves that can enhance the experience of masturbation. As they’ve become more mainstream, there are a number of different options to consider. Below are a few things to know and think about before making your purchase.



When people think of “pocket pussies”, they’re usually thinking of these. This type of masturbator tends to be about 4-7 inches long with a mouth, vagina, anus, or non-descript opening for insertion. Most masturbators will be made of a soft, skin-like material for a more realistic experience. This type of stroker has ribbing on the inside for additional pleasure and can be moved or squeezed as the user prefers.


You may be familiar with the original designer of this style of toy: Fleshlight. They popularized the stroker sleeve inside a hard case. Because the sleeve is inside a hard case, the sensation can feel more realistic as it is the case being moved rather than the stroker itself. These hard cases will also regulate the amount of air inside the device so the user can control the amount of suction and tightness at any given time. Not only does the hard case protect the sleeve from lint/debris, it also conceals it in a discreet case. Like the no-case strokers, these also come in mouth, vagina, anus, and non-descript openings. Often, companies will collaborate with popular adult stars or cam girls and make molds of them for the masturbators.

Powered Masturbators

These kinds of strokers will take the basic design of the hardshell devices and take them up a notch. With this design, you can get a masturbator that vibrates, sucks, spins, or milks. The most popular of these designs are the ones that mimic fellatio. Most of these devices are rechargeable, though you can still purchase ones that take batteries or plug into the wall.

Though these come with many benefits, they can often be a on the loud side so keep that in mind when making your selection. They will also require a little additional care when it comes time to clean it.


Because these strokers don’t self-lubricate, you will need to add lube to enhance the experience. Due to the nature of the toy’s material, make sure you are only using a water based lubricant. The use of silicone or oil based lubes will degrade the toy’s material.


No matter what kind of masturbator you’ve chosen, they all need to be thoroughly cleaned. Small, damp spaces are the perfect environment for bacteria to grow so once you’re finished, follow these basic steps and your toy will not only stay clean, but will last longer:

  • 1. Rinse: Most masturbators will have a hole at the opposite end from the insertion point to allow water or other fluid to be rinse out.
  • Pro Tip: If you’re using a hard shell style, you can pull the sleeve out for proper cleaning. Don’t forget to sanitize the hard case as well in case fluid got in.
    Pro Tip: With a moving/vibrating masturbator, follow the cleaning direction provided in the box. Some will allow you to remove the sleeve while others will require a little more attention and care.

  • 2. Apply cleaner: While standard toy spray is an acceptable cleaning solution, for masturbators, we suggest selecting a foaming cleaner. Once inside, the cleaner will expand into the crevices. Once it’s inside, move the masturbator around to evenly disperse the cleanser. If you have just the sleeve, rub it between your hands (like if you were trying to start a fire) to spread out the foam.
  • 3. Rise again: After you’re sure the cleaner has been evenly distributed throughout, rinse it out. At this point, any bacteria causing fluid will have been removed.
  • 4. Dry: It’s important to allow your toy to dry. Store it upright on a towel to allow gravity to pull the remaining water from the chamber. Give it a few shakes to make sure all the water is gone.
  • 5. Powder: Since most masturbators are made of a skin-like material, they do require one additional care step. As you use and wash your toy, you’ll notice the material starts to get tacky. To prevent this and keep it soft, apply a dusting of toy powder once your toy is dry. It will adhere to the toy’s surface to keep it touchably soft.
  • 6. Storage: If you’ve purchased a hardshell stroker, just insert the sleeve back into the case and pop on the lid. If you have no-case stroker, you will want to place this item in a breathable bag. Then, just stick them in a cool, dry place and it will be ready for your next use! To see more tips and tricks on how to properly store your toys, click here.

Adding a stroker to your masturbation ritual can bring you to new heights in your sexual exploration. With the wide variety of toys available, you’ll never run out of new sensations to experience! Remember, this blog serves as a guide to help you think about some of the different options when considering a stroker. If you need help selecting one, don’t hesitate to stop by your local Lion’s Den or chat with our online sales rep. Happy shopping!

26 Feb

All the Things You Didn’t Know Your Condom Could Do

Condoms are a staple in the sex industry because of the safety and peace of mind they can provide sexually active people. They are such a staple that we have a whole month dedicated to celebrating condoms and their contribution to our sexcapades. YES, you read that right. February is national condom month so to celebrate, I am here to tell you all the things your condom can do that you may or may not know about.

Penis Protection

Duh. This one is a given. You put the condom on the penis and it significantly decreases the likelihood of you becoming creating offspring if you are engaging in heterosexual intercourse as well as transmitting Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs). But now on to the things you may not have known.

Sharing a Toy

For those of us who are into using sex toys, you may have discovered that sharing sex toys with a partner is also an interesting way to spice up you sex life, participate in mutual pleasure and experience deeper connection. However, whenever sharing a toy, you run the risk of transmitting STIs because sexual bodily fluids attach to the toys and can spread to your partner and vice versa which could compromise your sexual health.
Luckily, condoms are here to save the day. You would simply put the condom on the toy while one person is using it and change out the condom when the other person is using it. This way you can explore all the sensations your toys have to offer together without compromising anyone’s sexual health.

Dental Dam

We hear a lot about the importance of barrier methods like condoms to maintain our sexual health. However, you can transmit and/or contract STIs orally, too. There is a barrier method called a dental dam. It’s essentially a latex cover that can be placed over the genitals during oral sex that can be used to inhibit STI transmission. But they are much harder to access than condoms.
Fun fact: you can turn your condom into a dental dam. I suggest you google it as there are many tutorials on the internet, however you basically unfold the condom, cut off the tip, and cut up one side. Once you open it up, you have a rectangle of latex that can be used as a dental dam.

Now you know a few more things about condoms than you may have before. Let this month of condom celebration be a reminder that using barrier methods is imperative to sexual health. Will you be exploring the awesomeness of your condom?


By Autumn Morris 
Certified Sex Educator 
CEO and Founder of Speaking of Sex

If you like what you’ve read here, check out other blogs and podcasts from Autumn! 


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19 Feb

All the Things You Didn’t Know You Should Be Doing to Your Condom

Most of us have probably been told over and over how important it is to use condoms during sex. We get it. But what we never really hear about is what steps we should be taking to ensure that our condoms are actually doing their job. It’s National Condom Month (yes, they dedicated a whole month to condoms), and there is no better time to make sure you are aware of all of the things you should be doing to your condom to ensure it isn’t compromised during sexual exchanges.

Expiration Date:

Just like lettuce, milk, and eggs, condoms expire. Before you use a condom, you should always be checking the expiration date on the back of the package. An expired condom may compromise your sexual health which is 100% not worth it. Save the headache and take the two seconds to check the expiration.

The Air Bubble Check:

All condoms are packaged with a small amount of air in them. This is intentional so you can check the packaging before opening to ensure the packaging and condom have not been punctured. To check the packaging, you will push all of the air to one corner of the package and ensure that the air does not begin to leak. If it does not, the condom has not been punctured and you are good to continue. If it does, then you should discard the condom and get another one.

The Water Test:

Let’s be real, sex can get pretty intense. It’s not uncommon for condoms to rip, tear, or pop during sexual exchanges of any kind. BUT there is a way to check after sex whether or not your condom broke during sex. Once sex is complete, take any and all condoms used and take them to the sink. You will then fill them with water. If they have been compromised, water will begin leaking out of whatever holes it has. If it doesn’t leak, the condom has not been compromised and you are good to go.

Now you are the master of condom usage and are ready to go into the world and use condoms in the most effective way possible. Happy Condom Month but remember that good condom conduct is a lifestyle. Happy sexing, my friends.


By Autumn Morris 
Certified Sex Educator 
CEO and Founder of Speaking of Sex

If you like what you’ve read here, check out other blogs and podcasts from Autumn! 


IG: SpeakingOfSex | TW: SpeakingOfSex_

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12 Feb

Charged Vooom Rechargeable Bullet by Screaming O

I have said this once, and I will say it again until the end of time. Bullet-style vibes are a necessity in everyone’s sex toy collection. It’s a versatile pleasure tool that anyone can use to enhance or produce sensations when partnered with a toy or by itself. I’m always on the hunt for another bullet-style vibe to add to my collection because I can never own too many sex toys and because I love sharing my experience with each one I get my hands on. So that’s what I’m doing today.


  • Rechargeable
  • 10 penetrating vibration functions
  • Made of lab-tested body-safe ABS


  • Length: 2.5 inches
  • Width: .75 inches

Tiffy’s Take

I heard somewhere that good things come in small packages. The Charged Vooom Rechargeable 10 Function Bullet by Screaming O is just that. It’s a small compact vibe that takes on a traditional look with some surprising and convenient perks. Because of its size, it can fit practically anywhere, including purses, pockets, in the cavity of any dildo that allows for a vibe to add some vibrations paired with internal stimulation. If I had to size comparison, I would say it’s the size of my pinky, which also makes it easy to hide in plain sight and away from prying eyes.

The one-button function allows for an easy to use operation, and a vibe this small being rechargeable is just the cherry on top. When you look at the Vooom bullet, you might think you’re not going to get a ton of power out it, and that can’t be farther from the truth. As a person who loves strong vibrations, I have to say that the Vooom bullet is one of the strongest budget-friendly vibes I have ever encountered. The vibrations are rumbly and reach deep

I personally find myself using this vibe as a lazy masturbation tool. Some might want to use it during sex because its size allows for it to fit comfortably between partners without causing “The vibrator is getting in the way” issues. And I will agree that it would be an ideal toy for that. I personally prefer a longer shaped vibe that gives me a little extra reach, depending on what position I’m in. That’s just my personal preference. But I can appreciate a shorter vibe that has vibrations powerful enough to get me off. If you’re looking for something relatively cheap, decently powerful, and easy to use, I highly recommend it. You really can’t go wrong with this one.

Final Thoughts

The Charged Vooom Rechargeable 10 Function Bullet by Screaming O is a decently strong bullet-vibe that can give you a plethora of options when it comes to pursuing pleasure. It can be used in multiple ways on everybody at a great price. If you're in the market for a first-time toy or looking to add to your collection, I suggest stopping by a Lion’s Den location to pick one up.


CLICK HERE TO CHECK OUT more Screaming O products

If you like what you’ve read here, check out more of Tiffy Kinks writing at her sex blog Aquakink.com.
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05 Feb

Doc Jonson Black Magic Pocket Rocket

If you’re in the market for your first sex toy or a simple vibe that’s easy to use, let’s take a look at the Doc Jonson Black Magic Pocket Rocket.


  • Waterproof
  • Velvet Touch
  • Requires 1 AA Battery
  • Made of ABS Plastic

How it Works

To turn on the Black Magic Pocket Rocket, simply insert on AA battery and turn the bottom part of the rocket and it will buzz to life. To turn the Doc Jonson Black Magic Pocket Rocket off, simply turn the bottom part of rocket in the opposite direction and it will turn off.

Tiffy’s Take

The Doc Johnson’s Black Magic Pocket Rocket takes me back to the days of owning my first sex toy and for good reason. Pocket rockets are a very popular sex toy choice for those new to the wonderful world of self-pleasure. It’s silky and soft to the touch, is waterproof for bath time and, also easy to clean. If you’re someone who doesn’t care for recharging your sex toys, the Black Magic Pocket Rocket only requires on AA battery to get things going.

I was very surprised by the vibrations. There rumbly and strong. This is a single-speed vibe, but it gets the job done. It’s small and compact, which makes it great for throwing it into a purse or bag for travel and using it during penetrative sex or foreplay. The Doc Johnson Black Magic Pocket Rocket features a cap with nubs for added clitoral stimulation. My favorite feature.

Final Thoughts

The Doc Johnson’s Black Magic Pocket Rocket is a great beginner-friendly sex toy that is easy to use and nicely sized to travel with it. I would personally recommend this vibe to anyone looking for a toy that can be used during partnered sex for added stimulation.


CLICK HERE TO BUY the Doc Jonson Black Magic Pocket Rocket

If you like what you’ve read here, check out more of Tiffy Kinks writing at her sex blog Aquakink.com.
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30 Jan

5 Things You Can Do For The Best Valentine’s Day Possible

Valentine’s Day is, as we know it, the day of love. We take that one day to show the people in our lives just how much we really appreciate them for loving us. Some take it as an opportunity to embark on a night of romance with our significant other or make new connections for the first time. No matter how you do it, the planning that can be overwhelming and even stressful. To help with potentially alleviate some of that stress, here is a list of 5 things you can do to have the best Valentine’s Day possible.

Don’t Wait Till the Last Minute

This one should go without saying, but it still happens. Try your very best to not wait until the last minute to make plans. You will be pushing your luck if you think you’ll be able to get a reservation or get flowers and chocolates delivered in time for the big day when requested last minute. Not to mention the potential up charge and inconvenience fees, many establishments can charge for not planning in a timely manner. Instead, set a reminder in your calendar and start doing research on whatever you want to do. Inquire ahead of time about reservations and special orders. Some establishments might even give you a discount for ordering so far ahead of the big day.

Don’t Celebrate Valentine’s Day On Valentine’s Day

Realistically speaking, taking off a day of work for the day of love isn’t ideal for many. The majority of us need those sick days for actual days when we are really sick or have an emergency. If Valentine’s Day plans are not ideal, consider making plans for another day when both you and your significant other are free. You might also find that it will be a hell of a lot easier to get dinner reservations. It will also be easier to go out on a weekday when there are fewer crowds and buying gifts like flowers, chocolates, and cards aren’t over-priced.

Create A Gift Basket Of Useful Things

If your significant other isn’t into Valentine’s Day, but you still want to get them something special, curating a gift basket filled with their favorite things is a great idea! I always say that the best gifts I've received are the ones I still use. And don’t get me wrong. I love getting and giving flowers to the significant people in my life, but getting something I can use beyond that particular day, makes it all the more special because there was more thought put into it.

Ask Your Significant Other How They Would Like To Spend The Day

If you are having a hard time trying to figure out what you should do for your boo on Valentine’s Day, just ask them. Not everyone is into the surprise factor when it comes to doing something special for them. There’s actually a great deal of thought put into listening to your partner and their needs. Taking that one day to make it about them should have them included in the plan-making. You might even be surprised by their ideas.

Give Them A Spa Day

Giving your significant other a spa day is an excellent idea for many reasons. A couple’s spa day gives you and partner time to bond and connect with one another while sending them a spa day alone gives them some well-needed self-care time for themselves. If you know their favorite wax studio, nail or hair salon, you can inquire about gift certificates or let them decide what service they would like to get done and pay for it.

Final Thoughts

The best thing you can do for your significant other is to be thoughtful in your gift. Being thoughtful doesn’t take much effort. The time you put aside for planning something special is such beautiful labor of love in itself. With the littlest bit of time management and resourcefulness, you’d be surprised at the fantastic ideas you can come up with.


If you like what you’ve read here, check out more of Tiffy Kinks writing at her sex blog Aquakink.com.

Twitter @Theaquakink

Instagram @Aquakink

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29 Jan

Shane's World Jack Rabbit

Dual vibrators are great for those who can’t decide on what type of stimulation they like. Clitoral stimulation or g-spot stimulation. What if you want a little bit of both? If you are new to the wonderful world of sex toys, then I think you should check out the Shane's World Jack Rabbit.


  • Made of Thermoplastic Elastomer
  • 8 functions of vibration
  • 4 Speeds of reversible rotation
  • 5 rows of beads
  • Tickling bunny ears
  • Takes 4 AAAA batteries
  • Phthalate free
  • Waterproof


  • 4.5 inches x 1.25 inches in the shaft
  • 2.5 inches x 1 inch in rabbit

Tiffy's Take

The Shane's World Jack Rabbit is great for beginners because it offers a plethora of features. The insertatable part is curved perfectly for g-spot stimulation and features 5 rows of rotating beads that can be set to rotate either clock-wise or counter-clockwise as well as having offering clitoral stimulation in the rabbit ears that come with 8 functions of vibration. Because both the rotating beads and bunny ears can operate simultaneously, the Shane's World Jack Rabbit will provide a customizable experience, perfect for those looking for a toy with more than one function.

The design in quite compact which is great for those who aren’t sure whether or not they’re a fan of girth just yet, but want something that offers a decent amount of fullness. I personally enjoyed using this rabbit to thrust with as the insertable part is curved very nicely and targets my g-spot well. Because this vibe takes 4 AAAA batteries, you don’t have to wait for it to charge and it’s travel-friendly, as you can simply remove the batteries to prevent accidental turn-on during travel. Did I also mention that this vibe is under 40 bucks? Yea. That part.

Tiffy’s Tip: While TPE or Thermoplastic Elastomer is a commonly used sex toy material, it is porous and not recommended that you share this toys made of this material with multiple partners as it cannot be 100% sanitized, leaving behind small traces of bacteria. This material may also cause skin irritations and UTI’S from bacteria left in toy even after cleaning. Additionally, TPE is not a forever material and is suggested that it be replaced with a body-safe option when possible.

Final Thoughts

Maybe this is your first time ever buying a vibrator. Or maybe this is your first rabbit purchase. I personally think that the Cal Exotics Shane’s World Jack Rabbit will provide you with the perfect amount of stimulation and convenience needed in a first time vibrator purchase. It provides clitoral and g-spot stimulation, is waterproof, and travel-friendly. I will say that it is important to understand that all dual stimulators (Rabbit vibes) are not universally anatomically correct to everyone’s body. With that being said the Shane’s World Jack Rabbit is a great start.

Suggested Pairings

-Your favorite water-based lubricant

CLICK HERE TO BUY the Shane's World Jack Rabbit

If you like what you’ve read here, check out more of Tiffy Kinks writing at her sex blog Aquakink.com.
Twitter @Theaquakink
Instagram @Aquakink
Enter Code AQUAKINK15 at Checkout and Take 15% OFF Your Purchase!
22 Jan

CalExotics Luxe™ Touch-Sensitive Vibrator

The Cal Exotics Luxe Touch-Sensitive Vibrator is what I would a 3-in-1 sex toy. You a dildo, a vibrator, and a piece of artificial intelligence all in one package. I’ll talk more about that last part later. Let’s dive in, shall we?


  • Made of Silicone
  • Technologically advanced touch sensor vibrator
  • The deeper you stroke, the stronger the power
  • 10 functions of intense vibration, pulsation and escalation
  • Sturdy suction cup base attaches to most flat surfaces and is harness compatible
  • Easy push button control
  • Waterproof
  • USB rechargeable
  • One-year warranty


  • 6.5 inches in total length
  • 1.5 inches in girth

How to Use

To turn on the Cal Exotics Luxe Touch Vibrator, simply press the power button located at the base and it will immediately buzz to life. To experience the touch-sensitive motors, simply squeeze around the shaft while it is inserted. Press the same button to cycle through the 10 functions of intense vibration, pulsation and escalation until you find the one that’s perfect for you. To turn off the Cal Exotics Luxe Touch Vibrator, simply press and hold the power button for 3 seconds.

Tiffy’s Review

Earlier I said that with the Cal Exotics Luxe Touch-Sensitive Vibrator, you get a 3 sex toys in one. I shouldn’t have said that. Because you get 5 sex toys in one! A dildo, a vibrator, a piece of artificial intelligence, a strap-on compatible sex toy, and an anal toy, as the Luxe Touch Vibrator has a flared base. Which is ideal for having some backdoor fun. Not to mention that the base is also a suction cup, so you can put it on any flat surface you wish and use it that way. What makes it a piece of artificial intelligence is the two touch sensitive sensors that turns the Luxe Touch into a supercharged vibe the faster you thrust it.

I have to say that I am very impressed with the Cal Exotics Luxe Touch Vibrator. The silicone that covers its rigid body feels nice and smooth on the skin and practically seamless. With its one-button operation, it’s extremely easy to use. The button also lights up when in use, which helpful when using it in the dark. It has a nicely pronounced head that can provide some nice g-spot stimulation without being too intense. If you want to take things up a notch with the g-spot stimulation, thrust it faster. Doing so will activate the touch sensitive motors and the vibrations will get stronger. Speaking of vibrations, they are ridiculously strong and very rumbly. If you’re considering using the Luxe Touch-Sensitive Vibrator for strap-on play, it should be able to fit into most O rings without issue but can be a bit of a tight squeeze in some cases.

Tiffy’s Tip: Always remember to used water-based lubricant with your silicone sex toys, as silicone-based lubricant can potentially ruin the silicone of your sex toy and void the manufacturer’s warranty. As an alternative, oil-based lubricant can be used, just do a spot test prior to use.

Final Thoughts

The Cal Exotics Luxe Touch-Sensitive Vibrator is the ideal sex toy for someone looking for a sex toy that can serve multiple purposes and is super powerful. This one vibe that I would recommend for both solo and partner play. Check it out at your local Lion’s Den location or at shop.lionsden.com

Perfect Pairings

  • Water-based Lubricant
  • Your Partner


CLICK HERE TO BUY CalExotics Luxe Touch-Sensitive Vibrator

If you like what you’ve read here, check out more of Tiffy Kinks writing at her sex blog Aquakink.com.
Twitter @Theaquakink
Instagram @Aquakink
Enter Code AQUAKINK15 at Checkout and Take 15% OFF Your Purchase!
15 Jan

5 Common Things You Didn’t Know You Can Do On Your Period

For some including myself, that time of the month can be more than just a small nuisance. It can be a huge inconvenience, especially when you have something important to do where you would prefer that Aunt Flo not accompany you. And while the shame and stigma towards menstruation is diminishing quickly with the normalization of the female body, it may not necessarily help with getting rid of some of the reservations you may have about your own body or any negative attitudes you may have learned from others. In an effort to put an end to the negative connotations associated with Aunt Flo, here are five common things you didn’t know you can do on your period.

Have Sex

For some, sex is a huge no no when on your period, mainly because it can get quite messy. But mess is good! I mean, unless you’re doing a quickie, sex is usually messy, un-organized, and un-choreographed. Just lay down a towel and do your thing.


When I first started masturbating, I would be so annoyed that I couldn’t do it during my period out of fear that I would stain my sheets. It wasn’t until I saw a video on the benefits of masturbation, where I saw a tip about rubbing one out during your period and its effectiveness on reducing cramp pain that I decided to give it a try. So happy I did. Depending on how you like to masturbate, you can put down a towel, or wear a pad if you don’t want to take your panties off.

Go Swimming

Going for a dive during shark week isn’t very fun. But possible with the help of a tampon or menstrual cup. Swimmers and athletes do it all the time and it is completely normal and good for treating cramp pain in some cases. This tip can also be used when getting into a hot tub or Jacuzzi with your partner or a group of friends.

Get a Wax

The idea of getting waxed down there during that of the month can be daunting for many reasons. For one, some women can experience a lower tolerance to pain which can cause your wax to be more painful than normal. I just wanted to note however, that if you did want to get a wax while on your period and think that it would be weird or un-heard of do such things, I want to let you know that many spas and wax studios do wax clients during that time of the month. Policies vary from place to place so make sure you ask in advance before booking an appointment and make sure to bring a tampon or menstrual cup to wear during the service.

Wear Whatever You Want

Of course this goes without saying because you can always wear what you want. I do find that women tend to avoid wearing bright colored bottoms and dresses during that time of the month out of paranoia. If you are worried about staining your bottoms and dresses with blood, especially in public, simply wear a menstrual cup or a larger pad or panty liner. Works a like a charm in most instances.

Final Thoughts

While these things are very simple, it’s always good to have these things affirmed constantly so that the conversations around menstruation continue and we can put an end to the shame and stigma that comes from having your period. I would also encourage you to share this article with those in your life who have either just started menstruation or the men in your life who can use a lesson or two on periods.


If you like what you’ve read here, check out more of Tiffy Kinks writing at her sex blog Aquakink.com.

Twitter @Theaquakink

Instagram @Aquakink

Enter Code AQUAKINK15 at Checkout and Take 15% OFF Your Purchase!

08 Jan

3 Major Take-Always To Keep in Mind When Arguing With Your Partner

While some like to refer to arguments as “Creative Discussions”, many couples may find it difficult to have a productive conversation when engaging in an argument when emotions are at its highest. This can lead to hurt feelings, where you or your partner says something with wrong intentions and create an even wider gap between the two of you than the one that may already exist. So when having a creative discussion with your partner, how do you get the most out of it without doing the most? Here are some tips that may help you and partner have more productive conversations that won’t leave you angry and frustrated.

Stop: When it comes to arguments, there isn’t always a clear cut way to solve a problem. When we think about the steps needed in basic problem solving, an overarching theme we can take from it is organization. We all know that arguments are not organized and when arguing with your partner, you may find it difficult to organize your thoughts when you both may already be annoyed or angry with one another. The best tip I can give for that is to either take a deep breathe, lower your tone, and change your affect. Or agree to resume to the conversation at another time. Choosing to resume the conversation at another time can help you both re-group and put your thoughts together so you can talk them through more effectively.  

Listen: It can be difficult to keep your ears wide open and your mouth shut when your partner is talking for a plethora reasons. It’s very important however, because not allowing your partner to voice their opinions can cost you the opportunity to solve your problem and could potentially extend it. Try your best not to cut off your partner and allow them to speak freely and openly as possible. Another tip you can try is to summarize what your partner is saying. This is a therapeutic process used to help others feel like they are being heard and understood. This can also help the person who is listening understand and internalize what their partner is saying in the right context because context is important.

Learn: This one is more so about coming out of disagreement on an agreeable terms, whatever those terms might be, as well as getting some type of closure. Usually when I  argue with someone, I like to make sure that whatever I argue about with them, that I am not constantly re-visiting it in future discussions unless it’s to joke about it. If you find that you or your partner is bringing up something from the past quite often after an argument, it probably means that it was not properly resolved. Listen to your partner and what they are saying but also make your voice heard as well. The line of communication goes both ways and the responsibility of keeping the line open belongs to you both.



If you like what you’ve read here, check out more of Tiffy Kinks writing at her sex blog Aquakink.com.

Twitter @Theaquakink

Instagram @Aquakink

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