22 Feb

Sometimes the best toys are the ones that you can find around the house!

Sex toys are an amazing step into the world of personal pleasure, but let’s face it, it can be scary buying something you’re not too certain you’ll actually like or use more than once. A specific style of toy known as a “pervertable” might be exactly what you’re looking for, and you might already have it at home!

Pervertables are essentially normal, everyday objects that, when properly cleaned, can provide some form of sexual satisfaction. Oftentimes these can be easily found in your house or even large chain stores. Here are some examples and different uses!

Wooden Cooking Utensils:

Think of a wooden spoon or spatula, these are perfect and incredibly common alternatives for a paddle! Using proper cleaning methods could include boiling or a mild soap and warm water. Make sure you dry them separately so they don’t harbor bacteria! The solid wood material is a great thuddy sensation and relatively light to practice with and see if you or your partner enjoy this kind of play. 

Ice:

How about taking a step into sensation play with temperature! Ice is a great introduction to the various sensations that can be brought on by varying temperatures on the body. Be mindful of sharp edges on the ice cubes though as you don’t want to harm your partner at all. Otherwise, ice is 100% body safe considering it is made entirely of water and will melt after use. Some uses include bringing more sensitivity to different areas of the body as well as bringing heightened sensations to someone who is blindfolded. 

Rulers:

Rulers, similar to kitchen utensils, can be used for impact play and spanking, but can add a layer of role play to the scene as well. They can be associated with the mental side of the interaction and help get into the role they are fulfilling such as teacher/student. Additionally, because this is a thinner piece compared to the kitchen utensils, it will provide a slightly stingier sensation rather than thuddy, providing something different to the interaction. These can be cleaned relatively easily with disinfecting wipes or with mild soap and warm water. 

Robe Belt/Tie:

Leather belts are a relatively commonly used item for restraint, but something that might be a little better for a first timer will be the belt to a robe or a necktie. These are made of a much more gentle material and are easier to tie safely. This is a great introduction to restraining but also has the ability to be used as a gag or blindfold. Make sure to always have safe words in place if you need to get out quickly! These often can be cleaned by being thrown in the washer with regular clothes.


14 Feb

Valentine’s Day can be a day full of love and affection between partners who have been together as long as a week to their entire lives. But what if all those hearts, flowers and chocolates just isn’t your style? Maybe you’re single and have no interest in the holiday as a whole. How do you find joy in a day that’s set aside seemingly just for couples? Well, instead of celebrating your love for another, why not celebrate your love for yourself!


Self love is an important aspect of celebrating oneself and the enjoyment that you can find in solo activities or just embracing the little self care techniques you can implement throughout the day. It’s easy to confuse self love with big extravagant things like treating yourself to a nice dinner and spending a little extra cash or buying that new item you’ve been eyeing for a while. But it doesn’t always need to be so extreme or pricey! In fact, here are some ways to show intense self care and love, regardless of your gender, without spending much money at all!


Show Your Body Some Love

When was the last time you truly gave your body the best attention you could give it? Maybe you’ve been lacking in your skincare routine or haven’t given yourself a good shave in a while. Now is the perfect time to run a warm bath with that new bath bomb you got on sale or some relaxing epsom salt to ease your muscles. A little bit of relaxing scented candles or essential oils will give you the much needed rest and relaxation you’ve needed for quite some time! If a bath or shower isn’t your style, take some time to thoroughly wash your face, maybe use a face mask or some moisturizer on your body where you might feel like your skin is getting pretty dry and cracked. Little things like this that maybe you don’t think of every day can help make your body feel fresh and rejuvenated if you’ve neglected it for too long. 


Have a Little “Me” Time

Has stress been building up in work and life? Maybe the little bit of time you do have is spent just trying to take the edge off and relax after a long day. It’s time to put your pleasure first! Take some time to really express yourself with bodily pleasure and explore the things that make you feel good. There is evidence that not only will masturbation and other self pleasure techniques help you relax, but self exploration has been linked to better sexual satisfaction as a whole, even with future partners! Use this time to find out what feels good to you and discover new things that you might want to continue doing in the future!


Discover your Love Language

Love languages are often something that is only explored in relationships, but how can they benefit you and your own self love? The 5 different categories are Quality Time, Acts of Service, Physical Touch, Giving/Receiving Gifts, and Words of Affirmation. Quality time can be as simple as setting up a regular time to just relax and do things that make you feel most comfortable. Acts of service can be anything regarding therapeutic work that helps you find ease at home. Maybe you let your dishes pile up or your room is a mess. A little clean up can help bring better peace of mind down the line. Physical touch doesn’t always need to be another person, but maybe your coziest blanket and a warm cup of tea. These warm sensations could bring a more soothing aspect that will help you relax, like a warm shower. Maybe it's time to treat yourself to something in your Wishlist that you have been saving up for, give yourself a little gift. And positive affirmations can always be a rewarding thing to hear. Whether you just feel like you’re really rocking that new hairstyle or just feel like everything is going well. It’s a great time to pat yourself on the back and remind yourself that you are doing great!

Check out the quiz to discover your love language here: https://www.5lovelanguages.com 


Give Yourself a Break

One thing that many of us can probably agree with is there is not nearly enough time in the day. It’s important that we take care of our responsibilities, but we can’t neglect the mental, physical and emotional toll it can take on us. Take some time to recuperate in the way that you see fit. Maybe it’s by taking the kind of nap that you fall asleep from and wake up wondering what day it is. Maybe it’s putting on your favorite tunes and doodling like you did when you were a kid. Maybe it’s pouring yourself a nice beverage of your choice before settling in with a good book or show you’ve been dying to catch up on. These little breaks help in more ways than one and can help rejuvenate you in ways you haven’t been able to experience for a while with your busy lifestyle. It’s always good to take a break, I recommend one around once every 1-2 weeks!

08 Feb

Can you orgasm without ejaculating or the other way around? To answer this, it’s important to look at the two as separate actions rather than one in the same.

Orgasm

In its simplest definition, it’s the point of sexual climax for an individual to experience. This is when, during stimulation, the pleasurable sensations cause the body to have rhythmic muscular contractions, typically in the pelvic region. Orgasms can come from many different types of stimulation on areas such as the genitals, nipples, or various other areas of the body. These muscle spasms are involuntary and often are accompanied by vocalizations, sudden movements and a sense of euphoria and immense pleasure. In the period right after an orgasm, known as the refractory period, these euphoric sensations become more relaxed and the release of endorphins and other chemicals in the brain can even potentially bring senses of clarity and enlightenment. With this being the climax of sexual stimulation, many people associate it directly with ejaculation, typically in those with penises. But you can easily have one without the other. Additionally, throughout time using techniques like tantra, the Kama Sutra and other methods, people have discovered ways to gain the same stimulation and orgasmic satisfaction without much or any physical stimulation.

Ejaculation

Ejaculation, on the other hand, is the physical release of fluid from the body that often accompanies an orgasm. For penis owners, ejaculation is the release of semen and sperm from the body through physical stimulation. For those with vulvas, ejaculation is the release of fluid from sources that are still being studied for a better understanding of the action, but is widely accepted that it is a mix of urine and secretions from the skene’s gland. When ejaculation and orgasm occur together, the same muscles that convulse during orgasm can cause ejaculation in the body, though it is not a guarantee. On rare occasions, the body can make the same muscular spasms as if it were to release fluid without actually releasing any at all. This can be due to multiple different reasons such as repeated ejaculation within a short period of time, genetics, surgeries and more. It is common in things such as masturbation, that people mistake a true orgasm for the quick physical satisfaction that comes from ejaculation. 

After Sex Blues?

Now, with all this talk about pleasure and euphoria, there is a phenomenon that isn’t well known even with how common it is. Post-Coital Tristesse, also known as the post-sex blues, is when someone engages in sexual activities yet feels emotions like sadness, depression, or anger after sex. This can potentially come after either ejaculation or orgasm. It’s important to note that this does not necessarily mean that the person experiencing it is depressed or sad in their everyday life. The combination of emotions that flood the brain during sexual activity can also be overwhelming and invoke reactions like this without any warning. The best comparison for this would be how when someone has too many responsibilities and their anxiety kicks in due to this causing them to shut down. These emotions should subside after a short amount of time, however, in that time they can be very damaging when mixed with the more “enlightened” thoughts that can come post orgasm as well. While they aren’t harmful on their own, this does leave the person at the mercy of their own mind.


So when thinking about what the differences are between orgasm and ejaculation, they seem pretty similar with only a few key differences. Whereas ejaculation is primarily the physical release and the satisfaction that comes from release, an orgasm is the full body pleasurable experience. Orgasms also include a level of mental stimulation as well with the inclusion of the chemicals in your brain being affected. While they can go hand in hand, they are two halves of the same coin.


02 Feb

It’s no surprise that sometimes condom use isn’t the most glamorous topic surrounding sex. It’s not the sexiest thing in the world and for most people, outside of its necessity for helping reduce the risk of pregnancies and STI transmission, they don’t like to think about it. But condoms have so many types and variations that it might just be the missing ingredient in mind blowing sex between you and your partner! Here are just a few variations that might help you and your partner find a new spark between the sheets.

External Lubricated/Non-Lubricated:

The most common condoms you’ll find on the market are standard lubricated or non-lubricated designs that do not have any additional design variations to them. A little pouch at the tip is used to collect any semen that comes out with ejaculation, and while majority are lubricated for easier penetration, some come unlubricated for the ability to match your favorite lube to it.

Internal:

One of the lesser known and even more rarely used, the internal condom is actually one of the most versatile. Its design allows for the user to wear it internally for up to 8 hours (varies by brand) before needing to be removed. This means that if you and your partner are into the idea of a little more spontaneity, this is the perfect option to be protected at all times when the mood strikes. This can be used both anally and vaginally and helps protect the surrounding area as well against STIs and such. These typically will always be lubricated. 

Studded:

Similar to a standard condom, this ups the ante just slightly with an added design element of little studs that protrude off the condom. These are worn externally and act like any other condom type with a reservoir tip to collect semen after ejaculation. The studs allow for extra stimulation whether it be used to rub against your partners genitals or internally against other sensitive areas.

Ribbed:

If studs aren’t your style, ribbed might be the next best thing. Using a wrap around design of protruding ripples, this helps give stimulation all around the desired area. This can be good for someone who wants a more subtle sensation variation. Like the studded, there are no additional design variations to the condom shape as a whole and it will still have the reservoir tip. 

Extra Lubricated:

For those who might need a little extra for a smooth entry, extra lubricated condoms use just a little more than a standard lubricated condom without making it too wet or sloppy. These are perfect to have an easier and smoother penetration with your partner and, with the slicker entry, it can make other sensations both internally and externally more sensitive. 

Specialized Lubrication:

Similar to extra lubricated condoms, and often with a little extra lubrication, these external condoms can have various different sensations that come with it. Some are used to provide a warmer or cooler sensation while others have a lubrication specifically made to intensify sensations in the genital area. Some of the more unique variations may include a delaying lubricant that allows for the wearer to be slightly desensitized if premature ejaculation may occur. The various different types can provide different sensations so it’s important to look into the different ones available and see which will be best for you!

Ultra Thin:

If you want the closest sensation to the real thing, ultra thin may be the option for you. Made of the same materials as typical lubricated condoms, these provide the same amount of protection in a thinner package, These also allow for the wearer and the person on the receiving end to feel much closer and, in some cases, much more naturally compared to regular thickness condoms.

Extra Thick:

For those worried about the condom breaking or being too thin for their sensitivity, extra thick condoms provided added material to make the condom stronger and refrain from tearing. This additional thickness also helps desensitize the penis if they are worried about premature ejaculation similar to the desensitizing lubricated condoms. 

Extra Large/Extra Small:

For those who may be a little larger or smaller than average, there are still plenty of options of every variety in sizes better for you. Majority of the time, Extra Large condoms don’t account for a thickness difference, but for length. But keep in mind, your size does not define you!

Novelty Condoms:

These are the goofy condoms that you might find in some hole in the wall shops in a touristy place and have wild designs and additional elements on them to “improve” sensations. It’s important to know that these condoms are not regulated like the others on this list and, while they could potentially still provide protection against STIs and pregnancy, they are more likely to be faulty or made of non-regulated materials harmful to the body. That is why it is always best to purchase a reputable brand that you trust.


There are so many different variations of condoms out there and the list is growing all the time as new companies attempt to come up with new designs that will help stimulate various areas of the body in better ways. Some new variations come with added material on the tip to provide more stimulation on the G-spot while others have a wavy design all over it for a more all around feel. Make sure to keep an eye out for what’s new to see if you might find the perfect type for you and your partner!


12 Jan

Anal Lubes

Anal sex is completely different than traditional penis-in-vagina sex in all the obvious ways, but also in terms of preparation. Many people believe numbing lubricants are for anal, but nothing is further from the truth. Discomfort (and maybe even some pain) reminds you to go slow to avoid injury. There are no one-size-fits all when it comes to lubricants, especially those for anal sex: some swear by water-based while others insist on silicone. But it’s worth looking into anal lubes that are condom-friendly, like Pjur’s Back Door Anal lube, or that have ingredients that keep tissue around the anus moisturized and help with healing, suck as Swiss Navy’s Premium Anal Lubricant with clove leaf oil that benefits skin. Couples should also look at investing in a lube shooter (CalExotics’ Lube Tube or XR Brands’ Cleanstream Silicone Lube Launch are great choices) to ensure there’s plenty of lube for anal sex. 

Cream Lubes

Cream lubes lets couples apply a generous amount of lube without a lot of mess. Cream lubes don’t run or drip, and they are easy to see how much you’re using at once. System JO recently released new cream lubricants specifically designed for masturbation: Bucked Smoky Wrangler comes with a light smoky leather scent, while Bucked Wrangler is unscented. Boy Butter is considered an elite cream lubricant and its uses extend beyond sex: it also can be used to soften and moisturize rough skin on hands, feet, elbows, and more.

Desensitizing Lubes

Oftentimes, these types of lubes are marketed for anal sex, but they’re best used afterward to help with healing and recovery. For penis-in-vagina sex, they can help men dealing with premature ejaculations to relax and last longer. Most rely on lidocaine or benzocaine as the numbing agent, which effects lasting a few hours at best. Just remember that sensitizing lubricants will affect both partners, meaning they could have an impact on her enjoyment. Anal-Ese from Nasstoys is one of the original products in this category.

Flavored Lubes

These are the lubes that have come the furthest in recent years. It wasn’t long ago the options for flavored lube were strawberry, watermelon and mint and not much else. Not only were flavors limited, but they also often had a medicine-like aftertaste, much like cough syrup. These days, there are gourmet flavors like Adam & Eve’s Cotton Candy lube, Intimate Earth’s Salted Caramel Natural Flavors Glide, Wet Dessert Flavored Lubricant (flavor options include Whipped Cream, Bananas Foster and Frosted Cupcake) and Wicked Sensual Care’s Aqua flavors of Sweet Peach, Cherry, Pink Lemonade and more. Look into multi-packs or sample packs that let you try a few flavors with one purchase. The true quality of a flavored lube? If you can eat it over ice cream and enjoy the great flavor!

Hybrid Lubes

If you really want to settle on just one lube for all purposes, consider a hybrid. These water-based formulas are blended with silicone to create a longer-lasting lubricant that might not be as heavy. Sensuva’s Hybrid Formula Personal Moisturizer is designed for people who are sensitive or have delicate tissue. Hybrid lubricants are safe for use with most toys, including silicone sex toys, such as Sliquid’s Silk Hybrid Lubricant, which is hypoallergenic and safe for use with latex and rubber, too. 

Massage Oils

It might seem odd to use massage oils as lube, but many these days are designed for dual purposes. Earthly Body is a leader here, with edible massage oils in amazing flavors like Banana, Pineapple, and Mango in formulations that combine hemp, almond, grade seed, apricot, and vitamin E oils for moisturizing. All of the ingredients combine for a slick glide too and pare healthy enough for any body.

 Natural Lubes

Couples are getting more and more educated on the ingredients they are using on and in their bodies, even when it comes to sex, and rightfully so. Natural lubes use more natural and organic ingredients and avoid some chemicals that might be harsher for vaginas and anuses. Most natural lubes are free for paragons, petroleum, glycerin, and other sugars. Sliquid’s entire line of lubricants and other products fall into this category, and Sensuva, Swiss Navy, Wicked Sensual Care, and Wet all boast amazing products for those looking for natural items.

Silicone Lubes

Long praised for their long-lasting gliding effect, silicone lubes are where a little goes a long way. They don’t dry out or get tacky and there’s no need to keep applying during long play sessions. They should not be used with silicone toys, however, because they can break down and destroy the toys. Alchemy’s Silicone Personal Lubricant is safe for use with condoms and other latex items, as is Body Action Products’ Extreme Glide.

 Stimulating Lubes

Some lubes warm up, while others provide a calling sensation. And there are some companies developing two lubricants that pair together, kind of like “two great tastes that taste great together.” Warming and cooling lubricants are the perfect first step to dabble in temperature play. The most common ingredients are cinnamon or mint. Sliquid’s Spark uses food-grade menthol that cools when applied but then warms up with friction. Swiss Navy, a leader in the lubricant category, offers Infuse, side-by-side products to “excite his passion and delight her senses.” A long-time bestseller for Doc Johnson, GoodHead Warming Head Oral Delight Gel is great for use during blowjobs, since they warm his penis or her labia, and come in great flavors: Strawberry, Cotton Candy and Watermelon.

Water-Based Lubes

Consider the all-purpose lube, water-based lubes are safe for use with any people, as well as any toys and condoms. They closely mimic a woman’s natural lubrication, which is a major plus, but they can dry out pretty quickly, meaning you need to reapply often. Adam & Eve’s Pheromone Water-Based Lube blends with your body’s chemistry to increase attraction, and Pjur’s We-Vibe Water-Based Lube is great to use on its own but is specifically formulated for use with pleasure products from We-Vibe, manufacturers of premium sex toys for couples. 

05 Jan

Whether you’re not in the same room or not on the same continent, pleasure products manufacturers are making it easier than ever for couples to stay connected and intimate. Whether they be app-driven vibrators, remote-control stimulators, or vibrating panties, there are more ways to connect than ever before. Additionally, there are plenty of categories to choose from when selecting an item to keep you together, in a physical and metaphorical sense: remote-controlled, app-controlled, wearable vibrators, and so on. Among the best are:

LELO Tiani 3

One of LELO’s most popular couple’s vibrators, the Tiani 3 is worn by the woman during sexual intimacy to stimulate her internally and both partners externally. There are eight vibration modes and patterns: four are controlled on the toy itself, while the other four are easily cycled through thanks to the remote control. The toy’s SenseMotion technology means the Tiani 3 increase in speed and pulsation. There are issues sometimes with the Tiani 3 slipping out during sex, so be prepared to use hands to help it stay in place. Or, just let her have it inserted while he controls the remote to change up the patterns and speed at his whim. The remote works best when it’s in the same room as the Tiani 3.   

OhMiBod Krush App Connected Vibrating Kegel Exerciser Set

OhMiBod is a giant in the area of app-controlled toys. They were the first company to develop technology allowing vibes to respond to ambient sounds (music or a lover’s voice) and now they have the Krush, which not only helps women perform Kegel exercises, but allows it to be used solely for pleasure too. Technically, the Krush is compatible with two apps: the TASL and the OhMiBod Remote App. The TASL app oversees pelvic training courses, which, when completed, unlock new patterns and features in the toy. The OhMiBod Remote app uses Bluetooth to connect partners over any distance, letting them control the functions through their smartphone. The Krush looks like any other dual-ball Kegel exerciser, and it has a long, flexible silicone retrieval cord directed with a little heart at the end.

CalExotics Wristband Remote Curve 

The remote control here is a wristband that looks like any ordinary fitness tracker. Two buttons on the face of the wristband take the Curve bullet vibrator through 12 functions of speed, pulsation ad vibration for up to 180 minutes on a full charge. The wristband remote works up to 10 meters (about 33 feet) away. Perfect to wear during a night out at a club or a busy restaurant to have fun while those around are none the wiser. 

We-Vibe Moxie

We-Vibe is another big name in toys for couples looking to stay connected. The Moxie is a unique take on a panty vibe, with a magnetic piece that holds the curved vibrator in place in the crotch of panties. The cordless remote control has up/down and left/right buttons to power it through more than 10 functions of rumbling vibrations and speed. The Moxie is compatible with the company’s We-Connect app so it can be controlled by anyone, anywhere at any time. The app also lets the Moxie pair with other We-Vibe toys or even more fun. 

XR Brands Strap U Pro Rider With Remote

Pleasure products with remotes make it easier to surrender control and die yourself over to pleasure. The Strap U Pro Rider lets either partner power the piece through three speeds and six pulsation patterns as she uses the strapless strap-on (the Pro Rider has one shaft that inserts into her vagina,) to peg him.  

Magic Motion Magic Flamingo 

The Magic Flamingo looks like its namesake, with a long flexible neck that doubles as a retrieval cord for the smart Kegel exerciser. The Magic Motion smart Kegel master is made from body-safe medical silicone, with ABS plastic. It is fully waterproof, travels ready, and USB rechargeable. Download the app to your smartphone and let your lover control the speed and vibrations as foreplay while out in public.

Plug & Play Remote Control Buttplug

It’s not just vibrators for vaginas that can deliver on the hands-free fun for couples. The seven-function anal plug is tapered with a soft tip for easy insertion by either partner. The remote control feels like a game controller in the hand, so it is comfortable for user to go from mild to wild instantly. Use it in the shower, or play with the controls during sex to give either partner more thrills and chills.  

Pipedream Products Anal Fantasy Elite Remote Control P-Spot Pro

While let her have all the fun? This prostate stimulator can be used solo or during foreplay or sex and the remote means she can control the rumbling vibrations, leaving him to wonder when the next thrill will come. The remote has a single-touch control that powers the stimulator through nine patterns of speed, pulsation, and escalation. 

We-Vibe Nova

This rabbit-style vibe isn’t meant to be used in public, obviously, but it can be used across the globe thanks to the We-Vibe Connect app. Compatible with many We-Vibe products, the app in this case controls vibrations through the clitoral stimulator and the main shaft independently. Let a lover mix it up and keep her guessing on what is coming next. 

OhMiBod Club Vine 2.Oh

OhMiBod took its popular Club Vibe and made it better with a larger vibe that covers more surface area and curves to fit the contours of the body. The vibe slips snugly into a pocket lining the bottom of OhMiBod’s custom-designed black lace panties, but the vibe could work with other snug-fitting panties. The Club Vibe 2.Oh operates by pulsating to the ambient sounds around it, or with its wireless remote that boasts up to a 20-foot range.

30 Dec

Characteristics of a Healthy Sexual Relationship

What is a healthy sexual relationship: what’s right, what’s wrong, and how do you maintain a healthy and positive attitude towards sex both inside and outside of relationships? 

Sex Provides a Feeling of Well-Being

You must first focus on trusting yourself, and then you can choose someone who fits your needs as wildspank.com users told. Many people might consider sex to be a bonus - the majority of people see sex as an essential part of a healthy and happy life. 

Whether it is sex or masturbation - the endorphins released provide us with a wealth of different “well-being” emotions and help us feel better about different parts of our lives. Different studies have found that sex - both with someone new and a long term partner that you love - can have a positive effect on a variety of mental health problems, including: 

  • Psychological 
  • Social 
  • Physical 
  • Emotional
  • Intellectual issues  

Emotional and Physical Sensations Are Felt

Sex is one of the most important parts of a relationship, and without it, most relationships will cease to function. Emotions and physical sensations are often in sync - and most individuals report having much better sex with someone they love when in a relationship rather than one-night stands when they are single. 

The idea behind sex is better with someone you know and love is that you will connect on a higher level, and therefore, the sensations you feel will be heightened. Emotions and physical sensations combined help to encourage a much healthier sex life. 

Creativity and Passion Are Rediscovered

When you’re dating someone new, it can be overwhelming to express your true passion and creativity for fear of embarrassment. While this is natural in a new relationship, if it turns into something serious - expressing your true self (especially in the bedroom) is essential for a healthy and ongoing relationship. 

If you’ve been in a relationship for a while, rediscovering your passion and creativity could reignite a spark that was once lost. Rediscovering a previous passion can help encourage new passions and experiences in even the most tired of relationships. 

Suffering and Stress Are Tolerated as a Part of Life

As a society, we are accustomed to suffering and live stressful lives - whether it's keeping up with the jones, social media, the latest trends, or simply making enough to live the lives we dream of - it’s stressful. 

Tackling stress can be difficult, especially when it seems to be attacking us from every area of our lives - work, family, relationships, and friendships - and taking all of it on at once can feel impossible. 

Outside of yoga, meditation, and taking your stress out in the gym, sex - especially a healthy sex life - can improve your overall attitude towards stress and suffering and help you to, overall, live a happier and more positive life. Once you’ve tackled one area, the others are more likely to fall into place - or at least be more manageable. 

You Can Be Emotionally Vulnerable

Many people believe that being emotionally vulnerable can harm your sex life; however, it doesn’t need to be that way. Emotional vulnerability is extremely difficult to overcome; however, a partner who understands and continues to love can help you overcome your issues. 

A healthy sexual relationship won’t drastically suffer due to emotional vulnerability - as couples who break through these barriers have a much better understanding of each other and their emotional needs.  

You Develop and Maintain Healthy Boundaries with Others

 If you have past issues and don’t want to explore certain aspects of sex or enjoying sex with another person - that’s ok. A healthy attitude towards sex will help you and your partner make boundaries regarding your sex life; without meaning, you can’t enjoy each other. 

Sometimes, people don’t want to try in the bedroom and - even if you want to try them - part of making someone you want to sleep with feel comfortable and enjoying healthy boundaries understands you won’t cross the line you or your partner has made. 

Learn to Trust Others

Learning to trust others - especially when you’ve been burned in the past, can feel impossible. However, as they say, you can have a relationship without trust. Whether it’s a friendship, family, or someone you’re romantically involved in, every good relationship is built on trust. Trust is arguably the most important aspect of any relationship, and without it, you likely have nothing. 

A healthy sexual relationship will help you to learn to trust your partners. Once you’ve established a level of trust, that can be projected into other aspects and areas of your life - whether it be work, family, or friendships. 

28 Dec

Why do I like BDSM?

One night, your friend tells you a story about getting adventurous in the bedroom, or you might have read about someone else’s experience getting spanked and liking it. It awakened something in you, but you’re not sure what is going through your head? Why do you like the idea of BDSM? We’re going to explore this question to give you a thorough understanding of why you enjoy this type of activity!

Psychology of sexy corporal punishment

As most BDSM sites shared - the truth is that a lot of people around the world absolutely love BDSM; we want to talk a little more about the psychology of sexy corporal punishment. The psychology behind sexy corporal punishment can be very difficult to understand. In fact, it’s still being studied by certified psychologists!

However, the studies have found that people who enjoy BDSM typically embody some specific traits. For example, people that enjoy these practices are usually open to experimentation. That should be rather obvious, but there is also a love of discipline and order present in people. A high level of the conscientiousness trait can be found in both doms and subs, but not in switches. That means these people are more likely to have a willingness to keep things in place where they belong. 

Research also shows that doms are more likely to rank lower in agreeableness than subs and switches, which means they want to be in control of a situation. On the other hand, subs have a level of agreeableness similar to that of a control group member. 

The psychology of BDSM is deeper than we can get into here. Just know that many of the traits that make people interested in BDSM are rooted in their psychology, and that can explain vanillas!

Preparing for a punishment session 

How do you get ready for a good punishment session? There are several things that you have to do, including listed below.

  • Establish a safe word:
    • every BDSM practitioner should always have a safe word that stops the action.
  • Communicate with your partner:
    • what do you each want to get out of the experience?
  • Dressing the part:
    • does part of the role play involve costumes?
  • Clean and prepare all the toys and objects;
  • Set the mood before you start:
    • light some candles or do whatever you have discussed before to make the room look great. 

These are some of the basic things you can do to get ready for a hot punishment session. Always make sure you consider your partners’ needs before you begin!

The types we love 

BDSM comes in many different forms, so it’s important to know about the activities available to you as a dom or sub. Here are some of the best types of BDSM play that you can take part in!

Dom and Sub

  • Law Enforcement and prisoner;
  • Teacher and student;
  • Royalty and peasant:
    • these include domination and whatever acts the two have in mind. 
  • Bondage:
    • when your partner ties you up for a set amount of time.
  • Impacts:
    • when your partner is slapping, hitting, or otherwise flogging you.
  • Sensory torture:
    • you are tickled, paddled, or submitted to other sensations.
  • Removal of senses:
    • you can be blindfolded, nose plugged, ear plugged, and more.

These are just some of the different kinds of BDSM play that you can get involved with as someone starting. 

What we get out of it 

We have to ask ourselves, what do we get out of BDSM. Different people get different things. Some people get into it so they can exert control over others. Other people want to be a sub because they like it when their control over events is taken. Some people enjoy the sensations of pain or the pleasure they derive from being treated to tickling or spanking. Most importantly, it’s a journey of self-discovery. You get to discover how you feel after being put in scenarios that would never play out in your daily life. 

The importance of aftercare

Aftercare is one of the most important things you can do for your partner. If you’re punishing them for the sake of punishing them and don’t offer them aftercare, that’s not fun, and the results can be bad. 

You need aftercare to differentiate the “scene,” or the act, from real life. Rubbing lotion on a place that got slapped or being friendly with your partner can prevent a “drop,” a time when a person comes down from the pleasant feelings of BDSM and deals with the aftermath. A drop can get ugly for the sub, so you need to take care of them after a scene. 

Spend time together, have food, take a shower, and give them painkillers. These are all forms of aftercare that they will need!

BDSM practices are very fun and highly common in the world today. If you’re trying to get started, you need to understand why you find these practices interesting. Based on this information, you should have a better grip on what you get from it, why you like it, and how to behave after it’s all over!

01 Dec

2020 Red Hot Gift Set by Screaming O

Add some heat to the bedroom this holiday season with this red hot gift set! This set comes with Screaming O’s top-selling couples toys; a RingO, RingO 2, a soft-touch Vooom! bullet, a set of Screaming O Mints, and their Orny Vibe ring. 

Surrenda Oral Vibe by Nasstoys

Want to give them oral like never before? Great for a quickie, foreplay, or the main event, this uniquely designed mouth vibe turns your lips and tongue into a sensual paradise that is sure to bring your next sack session to a climactic finish!

Mini Marvels Marvelous Tickler by California Exotics

Turn your hand into a vibration station with this marvelous tickler! This handy finger vibe comes with 10 tantalizing vibrations and pleasure ridges to tease and please all your partner’s erogenous areas. Fully waterproof, you can bring this little wonder anywhere!

Afterglow Massage Candle by Jimmy Jane

Help your partner relax and unwind with this sensuous massage candle. Made of soy oil and shea butter, this massage oil will melt away tension and moisturize your partner’s skin which is perfect for these dry winter months. With the warmth from the liquefied wax, their cares will melt away!

Clone a X Kit by Empire Labs

Fear not, long-distance couples, this one is for you! With these ingenious casts from Empire Labs, you and your partner can mold each other’s genitals so you can be with them even for their solo sessions. These easy to use kits come with everything you need and are a great snowy afternoon activity!

Fetish Fantasy Series Heavy Duty Position Master by Pipedream Novelties

Everyone can always use a little support. This position master not only lends support for different positioning, but also allows you to venture into the world of lite-BDSM! This easy to use harness is fully adjustable and customizable for any romp session!

Charged Combo Kit by Screaming O

Two toys for the price of one! This kit comes with a stretchy c-ring for the penis or dong as well as a sleeve that will fit any size finger. But let’s not forget the most important part; the Vooom! bullet. The rumbly vibe offers 60+ minutes of non-stop sensation!

Fifty Shades Of Grey Pleasure Overload Sweet Sensations by Love Honey

Explore your forbidden side with this luxurious couples kit from the Fifty Shades of Grey Official Pleasure Collection. These seven compartments each contain within them a carefully curated toy or bondage accessory certain to bring you both into a pleasure overload!

01 Dec

Lock-N-Play Wristband Remote Panty Teaser by California Exotics

Knee-shaking sensations is just what the doctor ordered! This petite panty vibe attaches to nearly any pair of panties and once connected will rock their world. With 12 intense and unique vibrating sensations, the control is in your hands with the sleek and unassuming remote. Best for discreet play in public, this toy is great for beginners or experts alike!

Unite 2.0 Couples Vibrator by We Vibe

Unite for a common goal; pleasure! This incredible C-shaped vibe is expertly crafted to hug the g-spot while providing clitoral stimulation at the same time. Because it’s wearable and slender, it can be worn during penetrative sex to deliver orgasm inducing vibrations for both partners! As an added bonus, it comes with a remote to spice up bedroom play or can be worn out in public for a fun date-night activity!

Come Together Strap-on by Evolved Novelties

In 2020 it’s time to go strapless! This “strapless strapon” is perfect for those looking to break away from the traditional harness model. Designed to be worn internally, this vibe offers hands-free options for penetration and stimulation for both partners. And, because each vibe comes with it’s own motor, it’s completely customizable for the best experience possible!

Lush 2 by Lovense

Long distance love has never been so easy! This incredible, wearable, Bluetooth device inserts for fun both inside and outside the bedroom. With an amazing motor, this body-safe vibe will give you and your partner up to three continuous hours of fun!

TRYST™ v2 Bendable Multi Erogenous Zone Massager with Remote by Doc Johnson

One of the most innovative couple’s toys in years just got better! The Tryst is a luxuriously soft and smooth silicone vibe which can be used in nearly any way imaginable. Suitable for both internal and external use, this amazing toy is great for solo use but best for shared use. It also comes with not one, not two, but THREE motors to deliver 10 quiet, but powerful vibration variations. Not only that, the Tryst now comes with a remote to make your pleasure interactive and utterly effortless. 

Fifty Shades Of Grey Pleasure Overload Wicked Weekend by Lovehoney

This luxurious gift set is perfect for a weekend getaway (or staycation since its 2020). In this elegant set you’ll find an adjustable c-ring with a powerful motor, a sleek g-spot vibe, and a textured sleeve which can be worn on a penis or used on the vibe. Equipped with everything you’ll need for a night of fun, this set will not disappoint!

Wedge by Liberator

Everyone can use a little support from time to time and this device is perfect for that! The subtle slope of this positioning cushion will give you or your partner just the right amount of lift and support for a wide number of positions. It also helps get the angle juuuuuust right for deeper penetration to give new life and sensation to the old classic positions!

Be One Finger Vibrator by Fun Factory

Prepare yourselves for the greatest finger vibe! This sleek ergonomic vibe rests between you or your lovers fingers and delivers effortless vibration with every touch. With two strong motors that bounce off each other, every touch will feel electric. Perfect for foreplay, sex, or a BJ boost, this toy really does it all!

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